after more than a year’s hiatus i decided to take a more active role in our church’s youth ministry again, and last night i felt like i was re-initiated into the ministry scene. i was asked to write a script for a skit that would be acted out at tonight’s youth service.
truth be told, i was skittish about doing the whole thing. various thoughts filled my mind. i knew that i could write, but a part of me didn’t want to, because i felt that scripts, conceptualizing, and all that stuff weren’t my thing (which was a crazy thing to say considering that i did a major chunk of this in college!). i was just on the verge of backing off from doing the whole thing when a good friend talked sense into me and told me to stick to my commitment. which i did.
prior to last night’s writing process, i prayed. hard. not because i didn’t want to do it, but because i wanted to want to do it–to set all my fears and emotions aside and simply lean on God.
and whaddaya know. the ideas, words, and thoughts poured in. i had just spent nine hours processing information prior to that moment, and my brain was still cooperating and functioning well. my brain was refreshingly . . . refreshed. lol
i also realized three things about the whole experience:
1. i actually was able to produce output. in the same way, we don’t have to look down on ourselves at all. God already delights in us and loves us. the gifts he gave us are for his glory, and he wants us to use them according to his purposes. after all, he didn’t give us a spirit of fear–only a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. (2 tim 1:7)
2. the script in itself did not have to be perfect. admittedly, i was being hard on myself because i wanted it to be seamless and flawless. after last night’s hoopla i realized that it didn’t have to be perfect–it only had to be excellent. i was reminded that excellence is different–waaaaaaaaaaay different–from perfection. God is the only perfect being there is, and i am not God, duh. what’s more, God, in all his perfection, loves each of us even if we are far from being perfect.
3. being part of the ministry is not about what you can do or what you have–whether you lead a gargantuan small group, sing on the worship team, or create crafts. it’s all about serving God. he gave us all these different talents so we can serve him and bring further glory to his name. “Not to us, O LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness.” (Psalm 115:1)
at the end of the day, it is all about him. nothing else compares to that. not even our fears, insecurities, and limitations can separate us from that fact