by Pablo Neruda

I do not love you as if you were a salt rose, or topaz
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
So I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

Risk factors

Some people naturally are at higher risk of nonulcer stomach pain than others are. Certain lifestyle factors can increase your risk, including:

• Overeating
• Eating too quickly, sometimes with air swallowing
• Drinking carbonated beverages
• Eating spicy foods
• Eating greasy or fatty foods
• Consuming too much caffeine or alcohol
• Smoking
• Taking certain medications, especially nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), such as aspirin and ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin, others), and antibiotics
• Stress

Prevention

Maintaining a healthy lifestyle can often prevent nonulcer stomach pain. The following lifestyle changes may help relieve your signs and symptoms:

Diet

• Eat smaller, more frequent meals. Having an empty stomach can sometimes produce signs and symptoms similar to those of nonulcer dyspepsia. Nothing but acid in your stomach may make you feel sick. Try eating a small snack, such as a cracker or a piece of fruit. Avoid skipping meals. Avoid large meals and overeating. Eat smaller meals more frequently.
• Avoid trigger foods. Some foods may trigger the signs and symptoms of nonulcer stomach pain, such as fatty and spicy foods, carbonated beverages, caffeine and alcohol. Avoid consuming more than three caffeinated beverages a day.
• Chew your food slowly and thoroughly. Allow time for leisurely meals.
• Limit beverages during meals. If you feel full early on during the meal, restrict your intake of beverages.
• Take steps to avoid excessive air. To reduce excess gas and belching, refrain from activities that result in excessive air swallowing, such as smoking, eating rapidly, chewing gum, drinking through a straw and drinking carbonated beverages.
• Don’t lie down right after a meal. Wait to lie down until at least two hours after eating.
• Maintain a healthy weight. Excess pounds put pressure on your abdomen, pushing up your stomach and causing acid to back up into your esophagus.

Stress

• Create a calm environment at mealtime. This may help relieve stress-related indigestion.
• Identify current stressors in your life. Learn how to manage your stress. Exercising, if your doctor confirms that it’s safe for you, and listening to soothing music may help.
• Learn and practice relaxation techniques. These may include relaxed breathing, meditation, yoga and progressive muscle relaxation. (and prayer)
• Pursue relaxing activities. Spend time doing things you enjoy, such as hobbies or sports.

Fatigue

• Find the right mix. Balance your rest and activity.
• Try to have a bedtime routine. When possible, go to bed and get up at the same times each day.
• Sleep only as much as you need. Get enough sleep so that you feel refreshed, but avoid getting too much sleep.
• Take time each day to relax. Make time just for you.
• Pace yourself. Don’t try doing too much at one time.

Exercise

• Talk to your doctor. Get your doctor’s advice before beginning a new exercise routine.
• Take it easy at first. Start your exercise program gradually.
• Get regular physical activity. Aim for at least 30 to 60 minutes of physical activity on most days of the week to achieve and maintain a healthy weight and reduce your risk of many chronic diseases.
• Don’t exercise immediately after eating. Give your stomach time to settle.

today i had to go home earlier from work because of horrible stomach pains. it was a different sort of rumbly in my tumbly, so to speak. the pain was so bad, i was getting dizzy. i took some meds but they didn’t seem to work.

when i got home i went online, let some steam out (hehehe), and read blogs. and bam! what do you know, the pain is gone.

strikes me as funny actually, but what i needed was to just let some steam out (hyuk hyuk) to get rid of the tummy pain?

isn’t that how it is in real life? we have to let go of the hurt and hang-ups we have, to prevent from getting even more hurt. and then we realize after doing so how big of a relief it is. finally letting go.

okay i need to sleep now.

but this may just seem to be a pathetic means of getting you out on my system. better that, than having words left unsaid.

or resorting to chocolate ice cream and playing love songs.

surprisingly i didn’t do those things; i was too angry to feel sorry for myself. angry at you then, but looking back now, finding no reason why i should be angry.

you were just being human.

as a wise friend has said, at the end of the day, it isn’t about who’s right or who’s wrong, but it’s the friendship.

i’m just gonna look past all of these. i still find you an interesting person and a great friend. i believe one day things will go back to normal again. and i am hoping that the chapter that was to be opened will now remain closed.